That was then...

At that time, Al Bundy and his misfit, unmotivated family ruled the airwaves and, I suppose , there was something empowering about this klan.  They were sarcastic, selfish, and non-trendy – a huge counterpoint to the buttoned-up, Izod clad yuppies that were so prevalent in those post-Disco, Regan “Just Say No” days.  Al, Peg, Kelly, and Bud, in their slovenly simplicity, were harbingers and ambassadors for the soon-to-come Seattle grunge and slacker movement of the early 90’s.  They were the original couch potatoes.

But, as ground-breaking as they were in the late 80’s, I’m here to tell you don’t be like Al Bundy.  As fresh as “Married…With Children” may have felt back-in-the-day, Al Bundy was stale.  He was the embodiment of living life for yesterday and not for today.  A hostage to the past glory of his high school football successes, Al didn’t and couldn’t enjoy his life.  He hated his job, wasn’t attracted to his sexually-willing wife, and, so, he resigned himself to apathy.  Maybe he wasn’t the brightest man on the block, but, he didn’t have to live as a sad-sack, either.  Sure, he loved his family and had his Bundy pride, but fat, drunk, and bored is no way to go through life.

...this is Now.

Fortunately for us, the actor Ed O’Neill and the people who write his characters are genius, and they’ve given us a new, reworked, better version of the every-day-dad that is more reasonable and forward looking – Jay Pritchard, the patriarch on ABC’s sitcom “Modern Family”.  Jay, like Al, is not a perfect father.  He also has a sarcastic attitude and may embrace values and ideas that feel a little dated, but he is a forward-looking character.  He isn’t hung up on what happened in his life when he was a teenager; he is, instead, learning to do right for his family.  And, unlike Al, Jay is way into his beautiful wife and looks to make her happy, even when he disagrees with her perspective.  His approach is a modern one of learning and growing into acceptance, instead of shrugging his shoulders and living in the past.

So, thank you, Ed O’Neill, for giving us two fathers for two different eras of our lives.  And, thank you, Jay Pritchard and all of you other men out there, for not being Al Bundy.

< Listen to this meandering rant, and more, on the Tasty Televisionary podcast TSF18 here or on iTunes >

Are you old enough to remember when home video cameras first started to become popular and people started bringing them to parties or family things and somehow, whenever a video camera entered the situation, people changed.  You could be having a good meal or conversation and everyone would be relaxed and then some uncle would come through with the say-hi-to-the-camera bit and nervous people got more nervous, and outgoing people turned on the charm, and those in-between just kinda stiffened up and waved “hi” because they didn’t know what else to do?

Then, TV hit the air with a show called “The Real World” where they tried to capture that same social thing where everyone is hanging out together but there just happens to be cameras present?  What happened on that show in 1992 was sort of the same thing that occurred with your technical uncle – people became slightly warped, awkward versions of themselves for the MTV nation, and other people found that entertaining.

What was true in your family setting was true for those 20-somethings in that New York apartment – the camera changes things.

Now everything feels different.  Andy Warhol’s experiment has expanded.  The huge commercial enterprise that is now Reality Television has warped our true sense of what makes up the reality of our lives.

Technology and the interwebs have pushed entertainment into our lives every day in every way.  Videos on our cell phones, pictures and words everywhere; you’re no longer allowed to be shy or stiff.  You must have a joke, a smooth line, a sweet soundbite to share.  In this “I’m always on” world, friends become more like fans and all of us are performing most all of the time.

How can we not be confused by all of this expectation of entertainment?  Is Miley Cirus Miley Cirus today or is she Hanna Montana?  I can’t tell anymore.

In real life, now, people become impatient with those who don’t know their lines.  I’m guilty of it.  Standing in line 10 minutes to get a coffee and the person in front of me doesn’t know what they want when they get up to the counter, and I become so aggravated.  You mean they haven’t checked it all out, already?  They haven’t rehearsed exactly how they’re going to say their order?  They’re not ready for their performance?  Or, how about those people who always need help with their lines – using their cell phone – “Line, please” – to ask their girlfriend what they should get for dinner or what to pick up at the supermarket?

Do you sense it happening at work?  If your boss or some leadership person is speaking to a group of people, don’t you expect them to be perfect?  If they make a gaffe or are repetitive or lose their train of thought, do you lose respect for them?  Not only have we all become performers, but we have seen so much of this stuff, we have become intense critics, too.

You’re going to speak to me; it better be good.

Buddhists believe that reality is a big dream and that we’re all connected because we are all made up of the same essence.  I’m holding tight to that big dream part, because if I’m really connected with Snookie and her housemates from Jersey Shore, I gotta revaluate some things.

< Listen to this meandering rant, and more, on the Crazy like Patty (or Snooki) podcast TSF11 here or on iTunes >

It is OK if she has fake breasts,
and yet her kids are an incredible mess
because she claims they never have any money…

Is it OK if he professes to be true,
but you know that he has propositioned you
…on more than one occasion…

Is it OK for Nick Cage?

Is it OK if he wears a rug,
Is it OK if she’s planted a bug
in their computer,
so she can track all of his online activities…

Is it OK if they seldom fuck,
Is it OK if he tries his luck,
at the casino…with the deposit money for their new home
…and he looses it all…

Is it OK if she swears she’s quit,
but then, occasionally, she takes a hit
just to keep her sane…

Is it OK if she has a drink,
even though you tend to think
she’s pregnant at the time,
…never mind who’s it is…

 Is it OK if he roams the night,
because he says that he’s uptight,
and getting out
is the only thing
that calms him down…

Is it OK if they talk so sweet,
when you really know that underneath
neither of them is happy
in this thing, called a relationship, anymore…

~pp

<Don’t be hypocritical.  Listen, as well as read,  TSF7: Drop Everything  or look for it on iTunes.  It is slacktacular.>

I long for new music.  I easily fall into the media hype of some groundbreaking young band and seek out any and all of their recordings.  I have been known to incessantly fight the busy signal of a radio station’s request line in order to ask the DJ the name of the song that was played exactly 27.5 minutes ago.  I’ve then called the foreign-based record label to find a local retailer that might actually carry said music.  In my eternal quest for the new and different, I’ve canvassed my hip friends for suggestions, begrudgingly tuned in local college radio, combed the billboard charts, made purchases based solely on the esoteric words of a music journalist, I’ve dragged my classy, sophisticated girlfriend (now wife) through the rough and tubmble streets of Greenwich Village, New York City to seek out musty old music shops that carry used records and spend hours flipping through bins of dusty vinyl – only with the promise of returning the favor by agreeing to window shop at Tiffany’s on 5th Avenue, subscribed to new music CD services (remember CMJ?), provided false names to both the Columbia and BMG music clubs… even purchased random CDs based solely on the cover art or some annoyingly pretentious record store clerk.

But, that was a long time ago and much has changed in my life…

…- marriage, kids, responsibilities, and… the arrival of the internet.  While all those things are very positive (except the responsibilities of course), they’ve forced a sea change in my pursuit of, and perspective on, good music.

First, let’s talk about the pursuit…  It used to be a monumental task – almost a life mission.  With none of this newfangled super highway technology available, the search would be an exercise in persistence and patience (not my strong point) and eminently rewarding.  There was nothing like cracking the seal on a excessively expensive out-of-print LP or 12 inch record (yes, vinyl) that was meticulously shipped across oceans to my tender embrace.  Now it’s almost effortless – services like Pandora, Last.FM, and online radio take a direct feed from your heat and mind and occasionally spit out new tunes that you’ve never heard but can’t imagine you ever lived without.  Then, simply logon to iTunes, Walmart, or Beatport for underground dance music and instantaneously own the music of your dreams.  Sounds great right?  But, if something comes too easily its not valued.  And somehow, it all got kind of boring.

And that’s why I think my perspective has changed.  The new albums by American Idol reject Daughtry or the hipster band the Fray (and countless other modern “alternative” bands) just don’t hold the same charm, emotional bond, or depth.  Maybe I’m getting all old, bitter, and nostalgic but I just don’t seem to be able to find spanking new stuff that floats my boat.  And, I don’t like it one bit.  I don’t want to turn into one of those past-their-prime mullet-wearing aging classic rockers jonesing to hear that dumb Steve Miller song where the guitar line feigns a construction worker’s whistle at a scantily clad female.  Or worse, one of those hippies that’s balding on top but keeps his hair long on the sides and back so he can try to score some weed at the latest jam band summer festival.  But, I do often catch myself throwing on to my old Smashing Pumpkins, Nirvana, and Radiohead CDs for lack of better options. And now that alternative is the new classic rock, I am frightened of becoming all that I’ve sworn off.  Maybe I’ll cut my bangs and stop wear black.  But better yet… maybe there’s hope in some heretofore unknown group of teenagers with sonic sensibilities that evoke the same passion, purity and pursuit of perfection that mirrors the bands of our youth.

So, new music, I’m beggin you… make yourself hard to find and worth the effort.  For the sake of all of mankind!

~ rl

<If you were listening to crappy music instead of TSF 3: Frustrated Pleasures, feel free to listen or download now or subscribe on iTunes.  Please?>

Now, once we admit to ourselves its not about a lot we have to look at that. Its not about a lot. Is that disaffection I smell? So what is it about? Well, its about our experiences. As a group of people who were born in the 60’s & 70’s we all have some similar experiences. We all went to grade school and suffered through the same lousy curriculum and some of us even picked up the “new math” along the way. But more importantly, in my humble opinion, its about the history we lived through and how we experienced those events.

As a child I remember our TV having 13 channels and even remember the day my father brought home a betamax and we watched Star Wars and Young Frankenstein in the comfort of our shag carpet home. We were the first generation of Sesame Street fans and the first generation exposed to the 24 hour news cycle CNN brought us. We lived through some seriously significant and historic events. As kids we saw Reagan shot and the Space Shuttle blown into pieces. We had MTV and Lollapalooza and Al Gore gave us the Internet.

As GenXers we’re considered flannel wearing slackers with no interests or motivation? Yes, I like my grunge and flannel. I miss Nirvana. I’m often cynical and definitely unmotivated at times. I am without question anti-establishment and definitely don’t want to take any crap from Baby Boomers. Oooh they make me so mad with their rules and expectations! Are they all retired yet?? And Generation Y?? Come on.

So, now what? Well, we’re all at an age where responsibility rears its ugly head and keeps us from partaking in the indiscretions of our youth which we would otherwise jump head first in. We are pressured to act as adults but still feel like 16. Should we portrait ourselves as role models to our kids or nieces and nephews or whoever, when we know deep down we did the all the stuff the generation before us warned about and would probably do it again if we could get away with it. Generation X doesn’t play by the rules, so should we tell others to? Heck no. We are anti-establishment! Fight the man! Unless of course that is going to take a lot of effort, because then I’m not so into it. I think this is what Generation X is.

Oh, and by the way… Barak Obama is a Gen Xer. But then again, so is Woody Harrelson. Take from that what you will. ~cg

<Please give it a listen: TSF1: The Slacker Revolution Begins!>